Tuesday, February 10, 2009


I am changing.

I have cared deeply about one man for the course of the past 3+ years, and I'm done.

It's not that he's a bad guy or not worth it, but I'm changing. Over the past weekend, I was at a retreat where, for the first time in many months, I felt truly wanted. There was always someone who was interested in what I had to say or just enjoyed having me around. It made me realize that I've been an idiot.

I am worth being a priority. I am worth being paid attention to. I am interesting and funny. I am a young woman with a heart worth winning.

Who knows when and if I will have the right guy show up, but I don't intend to spend my time waiting on the wrong one.

Kayla over the weekend was talking about how a friend of our's needs to find himself, to be on his own for awhile so he can really figure out who he is and recognize how amazing he really is. I absorbed that whole conversation between Kayla and Terrence and realized how applicable that is to me.

Don't get me wrong, I won't deny love if it comes calling, but I also will probably take a break from actively searching. Besides, I should be the one being pursued, not doing all the pursuing.

I am changing.