Books Books Books & Yay for Calle's Graduation Day!

I'm with Calvin on this on.  Life could be worse, but it could be a lot better too.

On the upside, I got about 15 hours of sleep last night.  This was due to the fact that I hadn't slept even an hour the night before.  Sleep and I have become strangers lately.  I'm not a fan of that.  In the times I can't sleep, I read, so I've read about 3 books this week.  Not a single one of them was the book that Ian told me I should read and let me borrow.  I'm terrible at this.  Instead of a sweet sci-fi book by Piers Anthony, I've been reading a trash novel series called the Dark Hunter series.  They're by Sherrilyn Kenyon.  Again...TRASH novels, but the mythology created is pretty fantastic.  Too bad they can't take the concept and tone down the sex a bit and make it more story.  It would work for me.

Plus, the last book in the series I read (Dance with the Devil, if you're curious) introduced like 2 or 3 additional mythologies which I think she's created separate series of books for.  That's gonna probably be something I read eventually.  These are my terrible guilty pleasure books, and they're what I've been reading lately when I can't sleep. I'd look infinitely classier if I could tell you that I've been reading the classics when I can't sleep.  I do have a copy of Oliver Twist that I need to read sometime soon.  It was my favorite book as a child, and I'd like to read it again.  It had a Cinderella element to it that I think a lot of people really overlook which is a real shame.  I think a lot more girls would enjoy it if they realized that was there.  It's one of my favorite classic novels because in the end everyone gets what they deserve.  Oliver gets happiness and a family, the bad guys are punished, and Rose is happy.  It would be a good one to read again.

I also have been carrying my copy of Frances Mayes beautiful Under the Tuscan Sun which is an annual summer read for me.  If you've never read it, you should.  It's just so good.  You feel like you're part of Italy and it makes you want to be there.  I read it in the summer when I am daydreaming about where I'd like to run away (which happens at some point every year).  It's just a beautiful way to escape.  Plus it's full of recipes that I'd like to try eventually.  Chase down this book with some fresh sun tea in a tall glass full of ice on a front porch, and you are in business.

Unrelated to all these books, Calle is graduating from high school again.  It's funny because I moved so far from home, but I still have little siblings graduating.  Can't help but be proud of her.  We were talking about how strange it will be in the fall when we are both in college.  We're separated by 10 years, but we're still both going to school this fall so we can work with kids.  She'll be a teacher and I should finally finish my theology degree so I can be a youth minister.  Mine just means I'll be more qualified to work the job I already have with Children of Change as we grow and work with kids.  I'm hoping Calle's path is a little less confusing and complex than mine.  I know she's going to face challenges, but I'm hoping that she's smart and strong and makes sure she listens when God calls so she doesn't face as much needless heartbreak.

Money is the Suck

Dear Everyone,

I hate talking about money, don't you?  I've learned that I can ask any of you to help with anything that I feel is important and doesn't directly benefit me, but if I actually have to talk to someone about money that is either owed me or that I'm trying to raise for my benefit...I am the suck.  I lose my words.

I apologize if I sound like an idiot in the near future.  Know that I'm trying to make sense and that I will do my best to answer questions.

Thanks for your patience.

Love,
Jaymin

Friday Fun Day

Today is one of those days where I have a to-do list and I had things planned out, but nothing seems to be working quite right.  I planned on waking up early this morning, packing up my car, working till 5 and taking off.  While I was at work, I was going to finished editing the mailing list I'm working on, and Glennis told me she was going to come in and look through the envelopes so I could send out the mailing.

I woke up late.  I did pack my car up.  I'll probably be here at work for another 20 minutes, but I the mailing list won't be finished (guess who probably won't get sleep again tonight!  Woot!), and Glennis sent me a text this morning saying she was going upstate to help Kaitlyn with a project this morning.  This was fine, but then they got a flat tire coming back, so she won't make it back in time to look at the letters and I definitely won't get paid today.

Something about not actually being fully paid for the 4th week or so in a row really starts making you wonder what kind of security you really have.  Or it could just be that some things really feel better when they're on schedule.  When you know how much money you should be seeing and you end up with half of that...it's a little disheartening.  Makes it hard to budget correctly or get bills paid on time.

*sigh*  It will be fine.

Of course, I also, so briefly, thought maybe I'd finally figured out why a guy I know doesn't speak much to me.  I thought maybe he'd never received any of the letters I've sent over the past 4 years, but had seen notes show up for most of our other mutual acquaintances.  I thought maybe all this quiet was just because he thought I'd been ignoring him, and I could fix it.  Nope, he got my letters...he just is that quiet.  I over-think everything.

Somehow I feel like a balloon that's been leaking helium all day.  I was floating so cheerfully this morning.  Heading up, and now I'm slowly drifting down.  Maybe it's a caffeine crash.  I got plenty of sleep.

Instead of focusing on all the negative, let's focus on something good to wrap up with tale of whine and woe.

Favorite things of this very moment (4:48 PM EST):

• A quiet place to whine
• That I can text and use the interwebz at work
• Getting as much of the mailing list done as I did
• Knowing I should get some time in the sunshine over the weekend
• Knowing I should get to see Cheat & fam this weekend
• "Easy A" & "The Rocker" both being in my suitcase
• Chocolate Zico for the road
• Margie from the post office always being willing to take the time to answer my questions
• Small miracles
• White lace shoes
• Being almost done with the work day
• That it's Friday

And Hope Walks In...

This is where my summer started. I was in TN stopped at the prettiest rest stop in the world: Nickajack Dam. I took the time to walk around the rest area and I took this picture. It seemed incredibly symbolic for me.

I was staring up at the steps of my life. The steps that would take me into a new portion of life. A new bit.

Life is far from what I planned. First a summer at home that I didn't expect, and now a fall semester at home. No school, just work.

And yet, this is okay. I feel at peace. I'm homesick for my life at ABC, for the people their, for the churches I'm involved with, buuuut I'm already seeing where I could be of use here. I've got friends here at home that I didn't expect to be here. I have people to encourage. I have new joys to locate and new things to try.

Also, I was asked to be on the board of directors for a nonprofit organization called Children of Change. I thought I'd be thinking about this far into the next couple of weeks, but instead all it took was one really good conversation for me to decide. I agreed. Eventually, according to the plan, when things are off the ground and running, I'll step down from the board and be the office manager. Maybe that sounds backwards, but really, for me, that's perfect. I want to be the one helping keep us together and making sure everyone has what they need. I've been working on offices for the past...what...6 or more years? I'm getting better and better and keeping it all together, and I look forward to the day when I can actually run the office of this grade organization called Children of Change. Just wait, God will do great things here. We just have to stay focused on his lead.

God does amazing things in my life. No matter where He puts me.

I love this.