Day 2: This is Why I Love You

Dear Tyler,

I love you. Today we spent a good deal of time being adults: making food, doing dishes, taking out trash, doing laundry, ordering stuff for the wedding, and running errands. There are days that trying to do all of this adulting feels overwhelming and all I want to do is curl up and watch cartoons (which we both know I’d do every day if I had the chance), but you make this better. I am so lucky that I am marrying a man who is willing to pitch in anytime. You are a wonderful partner to do any task with. I know a lot of couples that are super one-sided in their chores and household tasks, but I’ve been so lucky in finding a man who will move laundry, help with dishes, run errands, and who is an amazing cook. You are so much better than I deserve. Thank you for loving me even when I’m stressed and snarky. I am so grateful I have you. This is just one more reason why I love you. 

All my love,

J

Day 1: This is Why I Love You

Tyler, my love,

We’re only 12 days out from our wedding, and I still find this hard to believe. It’s been interesting the past two years to say the very least. I never could have begun to conceive of the love I found in you when you showed up. 

You showed up. I love this. I love that when you say you’ll do something, you do it. When I need you, you always come through for me. When I had finally let go of the idea that I would ever truly experience the joy of loving someone and getting their love in return, you showed up. You’ve swept me off my feet, and you never let me fall. You’ve never broken your promises, and this is why I believe you when you say you want to marry me. I trust that you will keep the vows we will make to each other in 12 days. This is why I love you. 

My love always,

J

This is Why I Love You

I’m challenging myself to write for Write31days one more time. It’s been an interesting year, and this month is going to be particularly magical because on the 13th of this month, I’m marrying the love of my life, Tyler. As a result, I’m choosing to spend this month writing him notes each day talking about why I love him and exploring this new life we’re creating. 

love, 

Me

Day 31: God

Dear God,

Thank you. 

Thank you for the crazy month of October. Always crazy it seems, but I am grateful. Thank you for my incredible family, for my sweet friends, for renewed friendships, for my godsons, for the changing leaves and allergy medication. Thank you for giving my a home to live in, great co-workers, and a steady paycheck. 

Thank you for reminding me of what I've left behind and what's worth fighting for. Thank you for showing me, yet again, how blessed beyond measure I am. Thank you for showing up for me. I am always blown away by the ways you choose to speak. Your kindness and live blow me away. 

And your patience, Lord. Thank you for your patience when I am stubborn and your grace when I fall. 

Thank you for loving me. I love you, Lord. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 30: Mom

Dear Mom,

Thank you. 

I could not be blessed with a better mom. You always make time for me and listen when I need to just clear my head. I always feel bad for dumping out all my issues on you, but you always listen with so much kindness and understanding. 

Thank you for reminding me that of my light when I'm feeling like I'm failing miserably. You help me remember that the story is still in development and there is still magic and color to life. 

Thank you for seeing the best in me even when I'm crying and sound like a crazy person. I am grateful that you are willing to remind me of who I am and that you love me. 

I love you, Ma. You are the kindest, sweetest, most compassionate woman I know. I want to grow up to be like you. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 29: Acheron

Dear Acheron,

Thank you. 

I still can't over my good fortune in being offered the chance to buy you. I'd been without a car for almost a full year by the time David's offer came along and I still can't believe my luck. A Camry (even though you're not new) in good condition with good gas mileage, and you're all mine. 

You represent so much. The fact you are mine means there's always the chance for escape. Maybe that sounds a little crazy, but I need the promise of an open door to placate the dangerous edge in my heart. I must know I have the option to run. You give me that hope. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 28: Work

Dear Work,

Thank you. 

I know we don't always get on and sometimes I have a terrible attitude about you, but I do appreciate you. Few things in life are so encouraging as having a steady job with a steady income. After the past couple years, I know I am beyond blessed to have you. You've given me the chance to learn new schools, make friends with my wonderful co-workers, and a paycheck that never fails to show up in full on time as promised. I am so lucky to have you. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 27: Mixed Nuts

Dear Cast, Crew, Writers, & All Who Helped Create & Produce Mixed Nuts,

Thank you. 

You all helped produce one of my favorite Christmas movies. Honestly, I can watch it at any point in the year. Mixed Nuts is such a witty movie. The characters are lovable and absurd. Flawed as they are you can't help but love them. They give me hope that even I, flawed as I am, can prove brilliant and lovable. It's never too late. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 26: Empty House

Dear Empty House,

Thank you. 

You and I both know I'm not a huge fan of silence or loneliness or being alone for too long, but I appreciated the time. I never quite realize how busy or full our house is (even though it's usually just 3 of us anymore), but this definitely showed me. 

I really enjoyed doing my own thing. I cooked, I cleaned, I got some writing done, and did a little experimenting. Plus there's something about the quiet that's been truly relaxing after dealing with so many people at work. Maybe I needed a couple days of quiet. 

I'm looking forward to my family returning, but thank you. I needed this. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 25: Shebby

Dear Shelby,

Thank you. 

Sheb, sweet Shebby, I love you. You are incredible. Thank you for calling me and catching me up on all the great and crazy things going on in your life. I miss laying on the couches in your apartment watching Firefly or Supernatural and talking about God and boys and life and the future. You are one of those rare beautiful people who I can be 100% honest with about anything and everything and I don't have to worry about you thinking I'm crazy or shallow (we both know in crazy anyway). 

I love that even if we don't get to talk all the time, the minute we start talking, it's like we are just keeping a long conversation alive. Like no time has passed. Thank you for your prayers, kindness, laughter, and love.

Thank you also for being such a fantastic inspiration. I'm so proud of you for working so hard to take better care of yourself. You've always been gorgeous, Sheb, but you seem so much happier now that you're healthier. You look fantastic, and you inspire me to keep trying to be healthier. Thank you for encouraging me in this. :)

I love you, little sister. You're still my best fan. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 24: Readers

Dear Readers,

Thank you. 

Even if we never meet or leave a comment, I appreciate you. I also appreciate that none of you have harassed me for somehow writing 2 separate gratitude posts about Benadryl. As you may have guessed, it's been a special kind of month. Octobers often are. 

Thank you for sticking out with me. Special thanks to any of you who may have followed me on previous blogs (OpenDiary, Xanga, Live Journal, MySpace) or on Tumblr (http://crashesthewho.tumblr.com). It's just always incredible to realize you've written something that someone else is kind enough to actually take time to read. You are wonderful. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 23: Blackberry Lemonade

Dear Blackberry Lemonade,

Thank you. 

Applebee's was so smart to create you. You are the reason I went out of my way to go to dinner at Applebee's to tonight, and I feel completely justified in doing that. You just taste so good. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 22: Benadryl

Dear Benadryl,

Thank you. 

We've been through so much together over the years. Through bug bites, allergic reactions, and misery. You've never let me down. Thank you for helping me get through this week's fun allergic reaction to the flu vaccine. You kept me from tearing up skin that was itching like crazy and helped me finally get some much needed sleep. I truly am grateful. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 21: Ian Fleming

Dear Mr. Fleming 

Thank you. 

Over the years I've watched nearly every movie based off your brilliant character James Bond. He's a delight. A wonderful mix of humor, machismo, and quick-thinking. Your character has been a bridge for me over the years. He'd given me common ground to start friendships. Today I watched Thunderball with my dad and we loved it. I'd forgotten about the sharks and the underwater fight scene. Thank you for creating a character my father and I both love. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 20: Kyle

Dear Kyle,

Thank you. 

It's weird sometimes how something heartbreaking and terrible can cause something. My friend, I hate the pain you're dealing with and the ridiculous number of complications you're dealing with, but I am grateful for one thing: our renewed friendship. I hadn't realized how completely I had missed your laughter, concern, advice, and kindness. Thank you for your friendship. 

I am grateful for our shared history, values, sense of humor, and friends. All these things truly make you magical and rare. 

Thank you for being honest. It's been a distressingly long time since I've spent real time with a guy who understand the importance of using his words. You have any idea how awesome it is to have you actually explain what you mean and not just get upset with me if I question you? I have trust issues and have spent too much time being lied to or rejected or having guys decide to tell me I'm just wrong or get angry at me without ever just manning up and talking to me.  Having you step up and be a real man is such a blessing. Plus it minimizes confusion. Party. Bonus. 

Speaking of parties...a happy, happy birthday, The Kyle. I can't believe we're adults let alone responsible ones. :) You are a good man and a great dad. May God bless you in the coming year in new, beautiful, surprising ways and also give you the strength you need to get through the pain and difficult times. Many wonderful years to come, my friend. Many wonderful years. 

I love you, my friend. I'm so proud of you, I am so grateful that you are you, and that I get to be a part of your story. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 19: Grandma Thomas

Dear Grandma Thomas,

Thank you. 

I miss you. A lot. 

Grandma, thank you for loving me. More than that, thank you for loving all of us. It's amazed me over and over again since you died just how much you loved all of us and how you truly were the glue that held us all together. You always saw the good in us and tried to point us in the right direction. It makes me sad to think how much we took that for granted. 

Thank you for being a great example of the kind of woman I want to be. You were a loving wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. You were involved in your family and community, and everyone who knew you loved you. Your life and legacy give me hope. 

I miss you, Grandma. I love you. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 18: October

Dear October,

Thank you. 

You are my favorite month. Christmas Eve may be my favorite day of the year, but you are definitely my favorite month. The leaves are changing. My tree right outside my window is slowly turning scarlet and the sunlight filtering through casts a perfect autumn glow. We have turned the furnace back on, so now I get to hear one of my favorite sounds: a deep grumble and the snap of fingers followed by a rush of heat. The nights are cold enough, I need the magic quilt Grandma Cheatwood made to stay warm. The nights are also calling for hot chocolate and tea. It's beautiful. You are my favorite. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 17: UpSwing Crew

Dear UpSwing Crew,

Thank you. 

I really appreciate what you're working on. I know Saturday was the "pilot" of the service, but I believe this will be a wonderful new ministry for the church. It was intimate, enjoyable, and a wonderful starting point. Thank you for all the work you're doing to make this service possible. I know it takes a lot of time and effort to plan a worship service (especially when you're trying something new). I hope it takes off. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 16: Swedes Staff

Dear Swedes Staff,

Thank you. 

Over the past few years I've had a lot of time to consider you. I've spent some time in your hospital, most of it as a patient, and I want you to know you're wonderful. 

A couple years back, I dealt with pancreatitis nearly killing me a couple times as a complication of my gall bladder needing to be removed. Every member of your support staff that I encountered from nurses to lab tech to valets to administrative staff, you were all wonderful. You made me laugh, explained the medical terms, answered my questions, and did all you could to make me feel comfortable and at ease. 

I bring this up because I was reminded of this yesterday when I found myself in a familiar waiting room. I was at Swedes all over again, but this time it was waiting with my mom and for her test results. Thankfully her results were clear, we got to come home with no problems, but you were still the same. Everyone was kind. Everyone was helpful, and everything was explained. You really are wonderful. 

Thank you. 

Love,

Jaymin

Day 15: Ms. Finfrock

Dear Ms. Finfrock,

Thank you.

I saw you today for the first time in a long, long time.  I just want you to know that it meant the world to me for you to not only recognized me, but that you treated me like an adult and not the 13-14 year old girl that you had in class over 10 years ago.  Even more than that, you didn't grill me with weird questions about my marital status or why I'm working at a nursing home and not somewhere else.  Thank you for treating me like a respectable adult human being.  It may sound weird for me to thank you for that, but I'm at a weird stage in my life and this isn't something I can take for granted.  You were one of my favorite teachers in junior high.  I mean, you're the reason I first told a story in public and the reason I know how to make an omelet.  I have many great memories of you, and I appreciate your kindness.  I also want to thank you for your kind words about my family.  I know you are a fan of my mom, and I'm glad.  I'm fond of her too.  I also think she was perfect for the job of library director, and I think she's doing a wonderful job.  I'm so proud of her, and I appreciate you taking the time to tell me you think she's great.  I hope you have a wonderful week.

Thank you.

Love,
Jaymin